I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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