my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
This house was built for laser tag.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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