So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
