I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
At least make sure they are 18
Why
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
