I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
