I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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