My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
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