I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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