No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
