So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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