Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
