To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize
