It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize