Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize