I want to walk on stilts...naked
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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