VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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