Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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