dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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