Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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