I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
