hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
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