Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
