So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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