she looked like the bat from fern gully.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
