Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Randomize
