some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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