Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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