i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize