You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
