Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
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Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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