How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
my poor anus
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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