Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize