Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize