So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
