is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
