I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
