The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
