I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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