If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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