Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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