At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
