first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
