better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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