I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
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i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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