Heybabeimwearingurpanties
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
