I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Having a random hookup so left but love u
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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