a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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