i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
