Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
