dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
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He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
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I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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