beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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